Kundiman by Silent Sanctuary

Para kang asukal
Sintamis mong magmahal
Para kang pintura
Buhay ko ikaw ang nagpinta
Para kang unan
Pinapainit mo ang aking tiyan
Para kang kumot na yumayakap
Sa tuwing ako'y nalulungkot

Kaya't wag magtataka
Kung bakit ayaw kitang mawala

Kung hindi man tayo hanggang dulo
Wag mong kalimutan
Nandito lang ako
Laging umaalalay
HinDi ako lalayo
Dahil ang tanging panalangin ko ay ikaw

Di baleng maghapon umulan
Basta't ikaw ang sasandalan
Liwanag ng lumulubog na araw
Kay sarap pagmasdan
Lalo na kapag nasisinagan ang iyong mukha
Ayoko ng magsawa
Hinding-hindi magsasawa sayo...

Kaya't wag magtataka
Kung bakit ayaw kitang mawala

Kung hindi man tayo hanggang dulo
Wag mong kalimutan
Nandito lang ako
Laging umaalalay
HinDi ako lalayo
Dahil ang tanging panalangin ko

Bahala na
Ayoko muna magsalita
Hayaan na muna natin ang daloy ng tad-ha-na

Kung di man tayo hanggang dulo
Wag mong kalimutan
Nandito lang ako
Laging umaalalay
HinDi ako lalayo

Kung hindi man tayo hanggang dulo
Wag mong kalimutan
Nandito lang ako
Laging umaalalay
HinDi ako lalayo
Dahil ang tanging panalangin

Dahil ang tanging panalangin

Ay ikaw...
Ay ikaw...
Ay ikaw...
Ay ikaw...

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"Kung hindi man tayo hanggang dulo

Wag mong kalimutan

Nandito lang ako

Laging umaalalay

HinDi ako lalayo

Dahil ang tanging panalangin ko ay ikaw"

It is a song once dedicated and sang to me by a friend of mine, who treats me as a special person in his life.. He's jolly and fun to be with.. He always makes me smile and laugh.. I don't know how, when, where, and why, but we're so close to each other right now.. So close, but with limitations. We care for each other but no commitment. It's because we can't be together. We both know that and still, the mutual feeling is still there. He told me that the lyrics of the chorus he sang really comes from his heart. From then on, I liked this song for it reminds me of him. I don't know how things will go between us, but just like what the song says, "Bahala na.. Ayoko muna magsalita.. Hayaan na muna natin ang daloy ng tad-ha-na.." : )

In a dying relationship.. I still hope for restoration..

In any relationship there will be ups and downs, happy and sad or crying moments, and even short or long term quarrels. I guess these are all natural. But I think what’s important is the decision you and your partner will make at the end of each day. As long as both of you choose and decide to continue, even it means letting go of one’s pride to resolve all the issues, I know, your relationship will be more beautiful and will eventually last a lifetime. The best reason why to continue? It would be love. Yes, it is because the love and care both of you have for each other is the very foundation of your relationship. Never let it be neglected. Never let it weaken. Or else, sooner or later, that once strong relationship will die.

I’ve been to in a relationship, and still I am now. I’ve also heard and seen other people’s relationships. Some are quite similar, others are totally different. But of all, what’s scares me and makes me so sad that much are the times I am witnessing a dying relationship. It would be harder to deal with if you’ve seen that dying relationship was once strong and happy for a very long time before. But now, the magic was gone, not even a glow at all. It seems the only things that’s left are pride and anger. I can barely see the care for each other anymore. They don’t even chat like lovers do. Actually, they don’t talk a lot now except if it’s about the cost of living. It feels like the relationship they have now is just a responsibility. Even though they’re both living at the same house, it feels like there is a division – they have their own territory.

The bible says in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” As for what I can see and feel, they are no longer patient with one another. They are easily angered. They always keep one’s record of wrong to hurt the other’s feelings every time they have a quarrel. I have seen that there’s jealousy that had been neglected. Thus, it resulted to too much anger and then to the dishonor of other people. They always guard themselves with pride that’s why most issues are still not resolved. The worst is it’s as if they only care for themselves because they can’t even sympathize with the affected individuals whenever they’re not okay. They just fight or shout at each other whenever they wanted to without considering the feelings of the people around them. Their perseverance to keep their relationship going feels like it’s no longer out of love, but now only out of responsibility. I even feel like they no longer seem to bother of protecting his/her partner from being hurt. Even though there is trust, it’s as if there’s no hope.

But despite of all these, I still hope and pray to God for the restoration of their relationship. 

I wanna be the reason.. -_-

Pride.. A Relationship Suicide (An Excerpt)

It is always good to have pride, I will never dispute that but there is such a thing as having too much pride. It’s great to “protect” yourself from others; however, when you find someone that truly loves you then it’s okay to let your guard down. It is okay to look within yourself and realize you don’t have control of the situation and in need of someone’s help. It is righteous to say sorry when you know you have hurt the other person or have been wrongful toward them.

Let’s discuss pride a little bit. What comes to mind when you think of the word pride or someone being prideful? Think about this for a few seconds. Okay… now this is what comes to my mind — I think the person is too weak to deal with pain so they protect themselves to appear strong. You may disagree with me, but think about it. Most people think that people with pride are strong people. People with pride cannot be torn down. They supposedly have great self-esteem, are always in control, don’t need help from anyone and are all powerful.

But ultimately we are all human. We all need help from time to time and we are not all powerful. As for overly prideful people, on the contrary, they only want to believe they have great self-esteem. If you pay attention closely they are not really on the up and up within themselves. People with too much pride often are holding things back and/or are hiding something that they wish not to reveal to anyone including their partner.

That’s why I say it is relationship suicide. If at any time in your life you should be able to let your hair down is when you are fortunate enough to find someone that loves you unconditionally that is not your blood. You are not giving your relationship a winning chance to survive if you are too prideful.

Prideful people think they can hold their own in relationships. Well if so then, why are they in a relationship? When you find someone you love you should want them to be a part of your team, not a part of what you say and what your ideals are. As you know there is not an “i” in the word team, however, prideful people think there is. To find someone is to make that person your other half if you realize that this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If you don’t believe that then you probably should be single and just satisfy your sexual needs from time to time.

If you find yourself as a prideful person then maybe you should back down a little in your relationships (friends as well) because pride makes you impatient, distrusting, and not accepting of those who do not ascribe to your philosophy, spiritual beliefs, psychological principles, and sociological mandates. And let me tell you nobody wants to deal with such drivel and if they do they won’t for long. It is absolutely frustrating and continuously irritating.

Pride will cause you to fail in every relationship because with such pride you will live a life of indifference, avoidance, and denial of the warning signs that what you believe yourself to be is not what you really are, which is quite sad.

So prideful people…

Wake up, be real, and take advantage of the love you have in life! Not everyone gets to be that blessed in life. Therefore, stop being cocky, accept other people’s feeling as real and justified, realize and come to terms with your weaknesses, know that you are not always right nor is your way the right way, your beliefs are your opinions, hardheaded, stubborn and overall deaf to the world in general. Snap out of it before you lose what could be the best thing that could happen to you in your life.

Source: http://relationshipliving.com/possessing-too-much-pride/

My dearly SPONGEBOB.. :)

I'm so thankful to God that I've already found my Spongebob - someone who accepts me and loves me sincerely despite of all my flaws and weaknesses. He is a God-given gift that I treasure the most. His love is sincere.. very pure.. that I can't help but fall in love with him again and again as time goes by. He's quite extraordinary, I guess, but a perfect match for me (smiling). He knows me very well - how I react on things, what am I thinking most of the time, what I usally say or do, etc. He even knows how to deal with my every mood. I don't know if I'm just that easy to read or he's just a good observant?  When I'm with him, I feel secure. Never a day that I'm with him that he won't make me smile and laugh. He also gained my trust that's why I feel ease sharing differnt things with him. Whatever's on my mind, i just tell him. No worries of being rejected or hated.  He's irreplaceable.  My world will surely be empty without him. Mahal na mahal kita beh beh ko.. :) I'm so happy that we're okay now. I really missed you so much! I love you! 

How pathetic I am.. because of my PRIDE :'(

I miss you..
I wanna see you..
But, I can't let myself..
Because of my pride..
How pathetic I am..

I wanna make it up to you..
I want us back together..
But I can't let myself..
I want you to do the first move..
Because of my pride..
How pathetic I am..

It hurts me so..
I can't take it anymore..
But still I don't let myself..
Because of my pride..
How pathetic I am..

I want to experience being courted..
I want to feel like you can't also live without me..
I want you to do the first move..
Am I selfish? Do I have too much pride?
I'm sorry for being like this..
How pathetic I am..

They don't see you like I do.. My world will never be better without you.. :'(

I really do love the movie "Shrek" because it always reminds me of our love for each other.. somewhat similar I guess.  What do you think? People might question me why I choose you over the other better man out there. But, I will never regret it.  My world will never be  better without you. Yes, you may have flaws that sometimes I can't really take, but in the end, my heart still wants you, only you, and nobody else. 

I really miss you. Mahal na mahal kita.. :'(

"Darling I do"

Golden leaves looked brown to me.

The world had less color without you

Shapes in the sky looked plain to my eyes.

The world had less color without you

I... know... plenty of people with eyes... closed

they don't see you like I do

Darling I do

Notes on the keys meant nothing to me.

The world didn't sing without you

Birds in the trees fell silent for me.

The world didn't sing without you.

Without you...

I... know... plenty of people with eyes... closed

they don't see you like I do

Darling I do

Darling I do see you

I... know.. Plenty of people with eyes.. closed..

They don't see you like

I.. know.. Plenty of people with eyes.. closed..

They don't see you like

I.. know.. plenty of people with eyes.. closed..

They don't see you like I do.

Darling I do

Darling I do

Darling I do

I do

Darling I do

Darling I do see you.